One of the most frequent questions I have been asked as a new mom of two is, “How do you like being a mom of two?”. I want to quip back with, “Being a mom of two is like being a mom of one, but twice as hard.” It’s not, it’s just different. Sometimes they simultaneously make you want to rip all of your hair out and sometimes the older one helps with the younger one so you can have a breath of fresh air (or go pee, same thing).
When I was pregnant with Søren of my biggest worries was that I would not love him as much I love Aiden. I had crazy nightmares that only pregnant women would understand. I could not fathom how my heart had room in it to love another child after loving only Aiden for eight years. I felt guilty and selfish for bringing another child into the world, despite our struggles to make it happen. It was one of my biggest stressors and I spent hours reading online about how to love two children “the same” all the while trying to reassure myself that everything would be okay.
Then Søren was born and my heart expanded two-fold. I swooned in ways I never thought I’d swoon for another baby. He is nothing like my Aiden. He is stubborn and constantly into everything. I love him for his curiousity and huge happy smile. Aiden is so gentle and big-hearted. He’s very, very imaginative and I love him so much for that. He has grown into such a caring and loving big brother. He plays with Søren now and even keeps him out of danger for a couple of minutes so I can “have a breath of fresh air.”
In all reality, the truth is that I don’t love my boys the same. I love them differently, but equally. So to any soon-to-be mama-of-twos out there, I just want to assure you that you will love your second child just as ferociously as you love your first. I promise.