Wearing Black Crane & Rent the Runway
Hej, hej! I’m back!
This summer was a whirlwind for me. It was a whirlwind not in the sense that my schedule was jam-packed but in a sense that internally I was struggling. I’m still struggling, but I’m trying my hardest to stay on top of it. Ever since I started taking better care of my whole self my mental health has become a priority. As a result I’ve become more in-tune to the things I need to do in order to keep myself from going back to the place I don’t want to be. I’ve come to some realizations so today I’m celebrating my return to the blog with 5 things I learned this summer.
1. It’s okay to not be okay.
The grass always looks greener on the other side and so often in the online world many of us browse continually it’s easy to assume that everyone else’s life is perfect. No one’s life is perfect, I promise. Everyone has their own struggles and while I’m not the first and I certainly won’t be the last to tell you, it’s okay to not be okay. It’s okay to feel and to process emotions the way that you need to, it’s part of what makes us human. Sometimes I’m okay, sometimes I’m not okay, and those are both okay things for me to feel.
2. Put yourself first.
Put yourself first. Seriously. I’ve had to do things that make me feel selfish just to save myself from stress or anguish later on. As someone who is often a giver, it’s not easy for me to allow myself to do things that feel selfish. As a mom I’m constantly putting my children’s needs before my own and it doesn’t serve me or them well. I’m a better mom for them when I feel like a healthier person to begin with.
3. You’re allowed to say “No”.
It’s ok to say “No.” To anyone, any time. Don’t let anyone make you feel differently. Ever. For far too long I’ve said “Yes” to things I didn’t honestly feel 100% about simply for the fact that I was afraid to say, “No” and this summer that changed. Something snapped in me and I now live by the popular adage, “If it’s not a hell yes, it’s a no.”
“If it’s not a hell yes, it’s a no.”
As a matter of fact, you can say, “No” to as much as you realistically can for a period of time as a reset. As much as I love this blog and the space here, it takes up a lot of my time and I had to walk away to get myself together so that I could come back with a healthy mindset.
4. Find what you love.
Once I hit a hard reset on life, I slowly began to discover again what I love. I learned that going back to my basics and most of what I loved as a child seems to make me most happy. I love long baths, nature, running, photography, the night sky, my plants, traveling, family and friends. It became clearer for me and easier to make very intentional choices about my time and life.
5. Rebuild your life slowly.
I started to include more of the things I love in my life again because I knew they were going to be the first thing I’d say yes to. After making a mental list of them in order of priority, most loved at the top to loved but not as much as the bottom, I added one at a time back into my life. If it feels like too much, the stuff toward the bottom comes off first since it doesn’t “fill my cup” as much. I’m at the point now (and so excited!) where I’m ready to return to work while still maintaining a balance in my life. If it feels too much, I know how to fix it.
The moral of this story is that my long baths still feel good, but they don’t mask the feeling of wanting to hide when I’ve been too laissez-faire with my life. Don’t let your life happen to you, be an active part because every single minute of every single day counts.
How was your summer? Did you learn anything? Go on any amazing trips? I’d love to hear in the comments below!